Beyond the Call of Duty
by Katief20
Summary: Nick is left badly traumatised by a devastating incident.  Can he find the courage to go back on the beat?
1. Chapter 1

It was a fine day although the March wind gusting over the North Yorkshire moors had a real chill to it. It was early about eight thirty and really only now becoming fully light. Miriam Lowther was driving away from Ashfordly over the moors, her young daughter, Daisy, in the back of the car behind her. Eight year old Daisy was not happy.

"But why do I have to stay with Nana?" she asked her mother in a whiney voice that made her mother grit her teeth. "I want to go with you an' Dad."

"Daisy we have talked this out. You know Daddy and I have to go to Scotland. Its all to do with Daddy's work. Very boring for you. And you said you would much rather stay with Nanny in Whitby."

"I don't want to! I've changed my mind!"

"Well its just too late now I'm afraid. I'm going to leave you with Nanny – you will be quite happy with her, you love going to Nanny's – and then I have to get home to pack for your Daddy and I. And I am late Daisy so no more arguing. Please!" Miriam could feel one of her headaches starting. She pushed her accelerator down a little more the car responding instantly. Yet she was not driving dangerously. What happened was an accident. Without doubt.

On the road here on the high moor the moor lay just below the road and to either side of the road were sloping embankments. Miriam remembered hearing a loud bang as a tyre blew. She did not know that was the cause of the bang until later. The car seemed to acquire a life of its own. It slewed across the road and the twisting road camber flipped the car over. It bounced down the embankment perhaps once or twice before coming to rest somehow right side up on the moor.

Phil Bellamy and Nick Rowan were someway behind Miriam's car but heading in the same direction. Phil was driving, Nick on the passenger side.

"So what's with all the overtime you're doing?" Nick was curious. "You've put your name down again."

"Need t'money don't I? I've booked an holiday to Spain. For me and Tracey." This was Phil's latest girlfriend. He had decided she was "the one" but as he had thought this about a few of his other conquests, no one was taking much notice. "Cost me a packet though."

Nick grinned. "Must be serious mate. Does she know."

"Yeah. She's happy but then she ain't paying for it is she?" Phil said with a grimace.

Nick looked at him thoughtfully wondering how much to say. He had a feeling Tracey was not looking for long term like Phil was and Nick knew a few of the other lads thought the same. But he didn't want to disillusion poor Phil and so he said nothing. He looked out of the window over the moor and then drew his breath in sharply.

"Phil, pull over now!"

Phil pulled up hard. Nick jumped out of the car to run down to the car he had seen from the road. Phil got out, reaching for the radio first.

"Nick be careful! Its going to blow."

There was petrol everywhere, flames beginning to lick out of the engine. Maybe they had a few minutes. That was all. Nick got to the driver's side. Miriam was banging on the door from the inside. Nick tried the handle and burnt his hand in doing so. The door was red hot and jammed. So was the rear door on that side. Nick got round the car. He opened the opposite passenger door. "Come on, move!" He half dragged her across the passenger side not caring right now if she was hurt. She would be dead if he didn't get her out.

"Daisy, Daisy, my daughter.."

The child was screaming in the back seat. "Mummy!"

"I'll get her," Nick gasped. "Just go, now!"

Phil was behind him now and swung Miriam into his arms shouting to Nick, "Well done, now get out of here."

"I'll just get the little girl Phil."

Phil moved Miriam a safe distance away, let her down to the ground and knelt in front of her. "Are you hurt, luv?" He took off his greatcoat, wrapped it round her and then became aware that Nick wasn't behind him.

Nick had opened the rear door. Daisy put her arms round his neck. "All right darling, going to your Mum now."

"My leg, my leg…"

Nick's stomach lurched. Somehow the runner from the passenger seat in front of Daisy had literally gone through the poor child's leg. The little girl was trapped hideously.

"Nick. For Christ sake!" he heard Phil scream.

"She's trapped Phil. Her leg…"

"Then leave her. Nick for God's sake, leave her. "

"No, No!"Miriam was up and trying to run to the car. But Phil had her and although she hit out at him he would not let go.

"Nick!" He screamed again.

Nick slowly backed away from the child. "I'm sorry, I'm sorry." Her arms fell from his neck. He moved away from the car. He was still very close when it exploded into a ball of flame.

Phil instinctively pushed Miriam down to the floor and protected her body with his. After the first explosion there were several smaller ones…..then an eerie silence.

Phil looked stunned at the blazing vehicle. He then looked across at Nick lying perilously close to the car. "Nick!" He was on his feet now to get to his colleague. But Miriam was also up and running to the car. He grabbed her. "No!"

She was beyond reason. Phil could not get to Nick, he dare not let go of her. He shouted to Nick, "Nick are you all right? Nick?" But Nick did not move.

He glanced up as a car screeched to a halt on the road above. A figure came racing down the embankment to Phil and the young woman. "Sarge!" Phil nearly collapsed in relief when he saw Sergeant Blaketon. "Sarge….Nick pulled this lady out of the car. I had her and Nick went back to get her little girl" Phil's voice was breaking. "She had her arms round Nick and she was crying but she was trapped. He couldn't get her out Sarge.."

Miriam slid back to the floor sobbing Phil crouched down beside her. "I can't get to Nick, Sarge.." he was saying but Blaketon was already there.

As he got to Nick, Nick was sitting up and had just finished being sick. Blaketon made a quick assessment. Blood from a head wound. Glass probably. He noted Nick's eyes were glazed. Shock or perhaps a head injury or both?. He knelt down not sure if Nick could hear him.

"Young Bellamy told me. Nick,I'm that sorry. This shouldn't happen to anyone. You won't believe me now but you did well to get anyone out of that car." Blaketon put a hand on Nick's shoulder. "We'll look after you lad."

Nick just didn't seem to hear. He started to get to his feet. "No, stay where you are," Blaketon began but Nick shook his head and seemed determined to want to get up.

"All right but I'll help you." Oscar Blaketon put an arm round Nick and supported his young constable to his feet. They began to walk towards the road as a battery of vehicles arrived – ambulances, fire brigade. More police cars.

Miriam was sitting on the embankment with an ambulance man tending her. She suddenly sprang up as Nick came closer. Phil grabbed her as she seemed intent on launching herself at Nick.

She was screaming, "You! It was you! Left a child to die to save your own skin!"

As she was bundled into an ambulance Blaketon eased Nick down into a sitting position on the road side and got in front of him saying, "I don't know if you can hear me Nick but she's distraught, she doesn't know what she's saying. You couldn't have done any more. Do you hear me?"

But Nick gave no sign and Blaketon looked despairingly up at Phil Bellamy who had somewhat relievedly left Miriam with the ambulance crew and returned to his colleague's side.


	2. Chapter 2

Kate and Oscar Blaketon were talking to a doctor in a room at Ashfordly General.

"I feel I should keep Nick here, Kate," Dr Hamilton was saying. "He's physically not in bad shape. A few stitches from a laceration caused by broken glass. No apparent head injury. But he's… "The doctor raised his hands in a helpless gesture. "Given the circumstances." He rubbed his eyes. "Nick wants to go home. So we'll let him. Get him home Kate and I'll send some sleeping tablets home with him. Sleep is the best healer there is. And then we'll take it from there. Bring him back to us in a few days for the stitches to come out and, well, we'll see how he is then."

Kate nodded. She understood. Blaketon thought he understood but he however liked things black and white. Said not unsaid. "Can you tell me what you are saying Doctor?" he asked.

"Nick is deeply shocked. He will almost certainly blame himself for what has happened."

"Aye but we'll look after him. Coppers. We always look after our own."

Dr Hamilton looked at Kate. Kate said gently, "It might take a bit more than a pep talk Sergeant." She looked at Dr Hamilton. "Can we see him now?"

Nick was sitting on a bed. He had a big dressing just above one eye and his shirt was blood stained. One hand was bandaged. Still his eyes were glazed and Kate's heart went out to him.

"Hey." She put her arms round him. "Its going to be okay. Listen. You couldn't have done any more. Nick. You rescued that lady. She would have been dead but for you."

But he didn't respond and she looked helplessly at Sergeant Blaketon who had come in behind her. And then they were distracted by a commotion in the corridor.

"I damn well want to see him!" It was a man's voice. "I want to see the copper who left my daughter to die. Dereliction of duty! I'll have his job!"

Oscar left Nick and Kate and stepped out into the corridor. It was a tall man, smartly dressed who was doing the shouting. Blaketon immediately guessed it was the child's father. Inspector Wood was trying to reason with him.

"Mr Lowther. Sir. Please listen. But for my constable and his colleague your wife too would have been dead. They rescued her against the odds. The constable involved tried to rescue your daughter but she was trapped Mr Lowther. Really there was nothing he could have done."

"He could have stayed with her." The man suddenly leaned against the wall of the corridor the fight beginning to leave him. "He could have stayed with her not left her to die."

"No Mr Lowther. He would have sacrificed himself. Its beyond the call of duty, you must see that." Inspector Wood took his arm gently. "Come on with me. Let's find your wife. She needs you."

Nick looked up as Blaketon came quietly back into the room. "I want to see her," he said suddenly.

"Who, Nick?" Blaketon asked.

"The lady. The lady in the car."

Kate looked at Blaketon but Blaketon quietly shook his head. Kate said, gently,"Not yet. She's going to be all right I understand but now's not the time Nick. Lets get you home."

As they walked down the corridor of the hospital, Inspector Wood caught them up.

"Nick. Listen. I have to tell you this now. I've had a quick talk with the fire brigade. They would have got the child out but it would have taken time. They would have had to cut her free. What I'm saying is there was nothing at all you could have done in the few minutes you had."

But Nick seemed incapable of responding and Wood looked helplessly at Blaketon. They watched as Nick left the hospital with Kate.

"What do you think Blaketon?" the Inspector asked his Sergeant.

"I'm not sure, sir.," said Oscar. "Other than I'm sure he'll always wonder if he could have done more."

To Kate's surprise and concern Nick put up minimal resistance to her when she got him home, made sure he got straight into bed and finally gave him the sleeping tablets from the hospital.

She sat by the bed for some time watching him sleep then gently kissed him and went downstairs to make a pot of tea. As she was doing this, there was a knock on the door.

It was Phil Bellamy now out of uniform.

"Do you mind me coming over Kate?"

"Of course not. Its good to see you." She hugged him. "Come on. Cup of tea?"

"How's Nick?" Phil sat down wearily by the fire taking the mug of tea she offered.

"In bed. Asleep." Kate paused. "I'm worried Phil."

Phil shook his head slowly. "I was so sure we had them both. The lady and the little girl." He swallowed. "He nearly had her Kate. If only her damn leg hadn't been trapped."

"Phil do you want to stay here tonight? Don't be on your own."

He managed a weak smile. "No, honest Kate I'm all right. Alf has told me to go to his tonight. Mrs Ventress is going to look after me."

She gazed into the fire. "I don't know how to help him Phil. I'm a doctor and I don't know how to help him."

Phil was quiet then said, "Most of t'job's just ordinary coppering. You know. Bit of petty theft. Some daft beggar getting lost on t'moors. Claude Greengrass busy on the Ashfordly estate. But now and again – not often, thank God - summat happens Kate and it isn't ordinary coppering any more." He sighed. "But what else can we do? We have to just get on with it somehow."

Kate said, "What if its so beyond ordinary coppering you can't just get on with it?"

Phil looked at her but said nothing. They fell silent watching the flames lick up the chimney.

Oscar Blaketon called by about eight o'clock that evening. Nick was awake but Kate had kept him in bed. She sat with him as Blaketon gently sat by the bed.

"How are you feeling, lad."

"Tired, Sarge."

"Well I won't stay long, lad. I just wanted to tell yer, we had a bit of news about the crash. Looks like Mrs Lowther's tyre blew. But she was travelling at a bit of speed. Not dangerous but enough to make a difference – she lost control." Blaketon cleared his throat. "The little girl, you wouldn't have got her out Nick. Only the fire brigade could do that. That's how badly trapped she was."

"She had her arms round my neck. She thought I was going to rescue her." Nick's voice was bleak.

"Its one of t'worst things to have happened and I'm that sorry it happened to you lad. But yer did nowt wrong – you were bloody brave doing what yer did. Beyond the call of duty. We'll look after you Nick. You take all t'time yer want and we'll see you back at Ashfordly when you're ready."

Nick looked away, and did not reply. Kate looked up at Oscar who seemed about to say something else. But Kate discreetly shook her head and he nodded, understanding. That discussion, about Nick coming back to work would wait. Anyway he would come back. Surely?


	3. Chapter 3

Two weeks later. Nick Rowan showed no inclination of going back to work.

He deflected questions. Yes he was fine, thank you. No he didn't want to return on desk duties. Alf Ventress brought some paperwork over for him to do. It was ignored. He slept a lot and generally showed little interest in anything at all. Kate was at her wits end. She couldn't get past the barrier, get him to talk. Phil had tried, Blaketon had tried. But the walls were up. He was not aggressive just disinterested.

On the third week, Oscar Blaketon went into the surgery to speak to Kate. She was working mornings only for now reluctant she did not know why to leave Nick alone too long. They sat in her office drinking tea.

"I'm at my wits end. I can't get him to talk to me. He sleeps a lot but doesn't seem interested in anything. If he would just talk.."

Blaketon said, "I thought coming back t' work would do it, like. Mebbe just a bit of desk duty. But he won't have it." He cleared his throat. "Division will only wait so long Kate."

"I know." She looked miserably down at her desk. "I can understand Sergeant if he doesn't want to go back to being a copper. But I think he should go back for a little while at least. Settle the demons."

Blaketon put down his cup. "Ah'll go and have another chat ter him on my way back to Ashfordly."

As he left Kate looked at the picture of her and Nick on her desk. She slowly traced Nick's face with her finger. What would it take to bring him back to her?

Blaketon let himself into the Police House. He always did this considering after all it was police property and he was a Sergeant! It was a habit which drove Kate mad in ordinary circumstances. But Nick didn't seem to care. He was on the sofa making a pretence of reading. Blaketon thought to himself _he probably hasn't turned one page of that book._

Nick was aware enough to make some attempt to get up when his sergeant came in but Blaketon raised a hand. "No need to get up lad." He sat down in an opposite chair.

Nick watched him warily.

"We need something from yer lad," Blaketon said finally. "You know you're not held at fault for what happened to that little girl. It were an accident and you couldn't have got her out however hard you tried." He stopped "You're a bloody good copper Nick. I want yer back in that duty room at Ashfordly."

Nick shook his head blindly. "I cant."

This was more than anyone had got so far. Blaketon was silent a moment then, "Why?" Deep down he was wishing someone else was having this conversation with Nick. Blaketon was kind, sympathetic, but he also knew he wasn't a one for talking. To his mind the best, only cure, for Nick was to get back on the horse as it were.

Nick was speaking. "I couldn't have got her out. I know that. No time. But I wish – I wish I hadn't had to leave her."

Blaketon ran a hand over his eyes, looked at Nick, saw how much he was hurting. "I wish I could make it go away, lad, make it not have happened."

"Yeah, I know." Nick sighed. "I don't think I want to go back to the job, Sarge."

Blaketon swallowed "You're a good copper Nick. Well, you've stuff ter learn, mind, but it's a bloody shame if you give up."

Nick said nothing. Oscar sighed."Nick, I won't make this official not yet. We'll give it another week. But after that…well, its Division. They'll want to know yer see."

"I know Sarge. I don't think I'll change my mind though."

Over at Ashfordly in the duty room Phil Bellamy and Alf Ventress were discussing the issue.

"What young Nick needs," said Alf as he ferreted through his lunchbox, "Is to come in here and get his head into some work. Do him t'world of good. Only way isn't it – get back on t' horse when you've fallen off." Unconsciously he echoed Blaketon's words.

"Yeah but what if what's happened is that bad you can't get back on the horse?" Phil pointed out.

"You were there an' all and you said yerself coming back on duty was best thing you did."

"Not quite t'same Alf. I didn't get that close. It weren't me that little girl were hanging onto was it?" Phil shook his head. "He was that close to rescuing them both Alf."

"Aye. It's a bad do. But I still say, best thing he can do is come back to work."

"I happen ter agree." The pair of them jumped. They hadn't heard Oscar Blaketon come into the station. Blaketon went on, "But he's not showing any signs of wanting to I'm afraid."

"We can't lose Nick, Sarge," Phil said desperately.

"Right now, it'd take a ruddy miracle to get him back in here." Blaketon looked at Ventress. "When you've taken your nose out of your nosebag Alf, I'll have a cup of tea. I'll be in my office!"

The two constables looked at each other silently as Blaketon stalked down the passage into his room and slammed the door.

That evening about seven thirty Kate was doing some work at home at the kitchen table. She jumped when someone knocked on the kitchen door. And loudly. She opened it and was startled to see Alf Ventress standing there now out of uniform.

"Hope yer don't mind Kate," he said stolidly. "Just wanted a word wi' Nick if I can."

"Of course I don't mind Alf," she said kindly. "He's in the office. I've no idea what's he doing in there. You go in, I'll bring some tea in, in a minute."

Alf quietly knocked on the office door and went in. Nick seemed to be tidying in there. He looked up as Alf came in.

"Everything all right?" he asked him

"Should be asking you that," Alf said levelly, sitting down at the desk.

"Just tidying a bit. You know getting things straight for whoever takes this on."

"So, its definite then."

Nick did not meet Alf's gaze. "Yeah. Think so.

"I'm not here ter try and change yer mind Nick. I'm not. I just want to tell yer something though. A bit of history, forgotten most of the time now. Now and again I get a reminder."

"Alf what are you on about?" But at least Nick was showing an interest, Alf thought.

"What happened ter you happened ter me years ago. When I was just starting out. Only in my case it were t'lad wi' me. John Ryan."

Nick shook his head. "I don't understand."

"I thought Blaketon might've told yer. Then again, he knows I don't like it mentioned." Alf settled himself in his chair. He looked up as Kate came in and thanked her taking the mug of tea. She made to leave but he checked her saying, "No you stay Kate."

Puzzled she sat next to Nick and they waited for Alf to speak.

"Well as I say. I hadn't been in t'job that long. I were on duty one night and I were with John Ryan. I were learning t'ropes yer see although John himself hadn't been in t'job that long. Mebbe a few years. Any road we were out one night and John spies someone up on a warehouse roof. Little beggar sees us, won't come down so we have to go up. John tells me to go up and, well, I wasn't that keen. So John tosses a coin for it and he loses. So up he goes to deal with it. Only you see, roof weren't that strong and he went right through" Alf shook his head. "He weren't killed but he broke his back. He never walked again. Well, of course I blamed meself didn't I. Yer would wouldn't you? Oscar Blaketon talked me into going back on t'beat. I didn't want to go back t'job – yer wouldn't would yer - but he wouldn't have it. Said I needed to go back just for a while, lay t'demons ter rest." Alf shrugged. "Well, still here aren't I?"

Nick looked quietly at him. "You think that's what I should do? Go back like you did?"

Alf sipped his tea. "I've told yer what I did Nick. What happens next is up ter you. But if you say ter me did you do the right thing? Aye, I reckon I did."


	4. Chapter 4

Nick was technically back on duty.

He used the word technically as his work was limited to desk work. Manning the radio, completing reports, gun licences. Mundane, boring work. Yet he was fine with this. He felt no urge to be out there on the front line.

Talking quietly in Oscar Blaketon's office, Ventress spoke frankly to his Sergeant.

"He's lost his nerve, Sarge."

"Aye." Blaketon sighed. "I can't put the other lads at risk Alf. I can't let him out on full duties yet." He tapped his desk. "Have we done the right thing Alf."

Alf was beginning to wonder himself. But he did not air his doubts to Blaketon. He said, "I'm sure it'll come Sarge."

"He's been back six weeks Alf. I've got to put a report into Division next week. I need more from him." Blaketon got up from his desk, paced the room, frustrated. "If we don't get him back Alf, this is a tragedy. He's got a bloody good career in front of him or he did have!"

Later that day Nick was alone in the duty room. Phil was out on enquiries, Alf had gone to Ashfordly Hall with Oscar Blaketon to deal with reports of systematic poaching. The station phone rang, Nick answered it, "Ashfordly Police, PC Rowan."

"John Talbot here. High Top Farm. Me daughter's gone missing. She's only seven." The man sounded breathless, panicky. Nick took a deep breath. He knew John, who was bringing up his little girl Megan alone following the death of his wife some four years ago. "Her aunt were wi' her in the farmhouse but Meg, she slipped off. And Mary, her aunt, thought had come ter me you see. Only Ive not seen her all afternoon. We've searched t' farm top ter bottom. There's no sign of her."

"I'll get someone out to you John. Stay at home, we'll organise a search when we get up there."

Nick reached for the radio and put a call out for Oscar Blaketon. Blaketon had been talking to Lord Ashfordly's gamekeeper and was standing near the car. He went to the car and answered the radio promptly.

"Go ahead, Rowan."

"John Talbot,, High Top. Reports his daughter missing. Last seen at 2.45. They've searched the farm but no sign of her."

"We'll need a full search party. Organise all available constables to go up to High Top immediately. Speak to Division, see who they can release. We'll need a dog team."

"I've done that Sarge."

"Right. Well, include yourself in that."

"Sarge?"

"I need all hands Rowan! You're more use to me out there than sitting behind a bloody desk! That's an order by the way Rowan."

Alf Ventress was looking askance at Sergeant Blaketon. "I need to push him Alf, " Oscar said quietly. "And we do need all hands. We need to find that little girl before it gets dark."

Not a bit happy with his Sergeant's approach Nick collected his motorbike which was currently in the station yard at Ashfordly. He set off on the journey to High Top a bleak farm on the top moors. He was actually first on scene and as he pulled the bike to a standstill in the farm yard a farm hand came running to him.

"We've found her constable," he gasped evidently having been running hard. "She's fallen down t' quarry. Landed on a ledge halfway down like."

Nick nodded. "I'll follow you up there."

He got on the radio, relayed this information to his colleagues, and requested fire brigade assistance. Then he rode his bike slowly up the track to the quarry. John Talbot met him, ashen faced.

"God, if that ledge she's on breaks."

"I know John." Nick bit his lip.

Cautiously he moved to the edge of the quarry. Megan's ledge was halfway down. She was sitting up and crying. He called down to her, "Its Nick Rowan Megan. I need you to keep really still all right. I'll be down to you in a minute. Promise." He paused. "Are you hurt love?"

"N-no."

"Good. You keep still there Megan."

He had to do something, he knew. But the fear was there. If there was another tragedy…He got a grip of himself and opened the panniers on the bike. Training and instinct was taking over now. He had doubted that was still there yet it seemed to be automatically kicking in.

He took out two long ropes. "Right," he said to John and the two farmhands with him, "I've got the fire brigade on the way. But that ledge could go before they get here. So I'm going down to her and getting a rope on her. Wind the ropes round that tree. I'll secure myself with one and put the other on Megan."

The men nodded and lashed the ropes tightly round the tree. John grabbed Nick's arm. "I should go down to her.."he began.

"No John. Best its me. You hold onto those ropes and pull when I tell you." Nick lay down on the ground and eased himself to the edge of the quarry. He called to the child, "Keep really still Megan. I'm coming down to you."

Alf Ventress and Oscar Blaketon got there as Nick eased himself over the edge. They glanced at each other wondering about the wisdom but did not intervene at this critical stage. They assisted in taking the weight on the ropes.

Nick got down to Megan and crouched beside her. "Hallo love," he said gently.

She wiped her eyes. "I was picking flowers and I fell. I didn't mean to be so near the edge."

"Hush, its fine. Look here's a rope. I'm going to put it round you, like this and then your Dad is going to pull you up nice and safe."

He roped her up and shouted, "Ok, got her."

Slowly the men up above hoisted Megan to the top. She was light and it didn't take long. Nick heaved a sigh of relief as she was pulled over the edge.

Now his turn. He half scrambled, was half pulled up the quarry face. At length he lay sprawled on the ground safely at the top. As he disentangled himself from the rope Blaketon crouched down beside him

"Well done lad!" he said. "I wasn't sure about you, whether yer could do this but you have. "

"Aye," John Talbot stepped forward and helped pull Nick to his feet. "I can't thank you enough from me and Megan for what you've done."

"Just doing my job , John. I'm glad we got her back safely," Nick said quietly.

Alf said to Nick, "Yer see, lad, once yer back on that horse it all comes back to yer. You've done right well today."

Nick was aware they were both anxiously looking at him.

"Yeah, all right," he said. "I wasn't sure, how I'd react, whether I could react. But…I suppose its just instinct isn't it?" He sighed. "Come on, I want a cup of tea after that.."

"Nick" Blaketon paused. "I'd have no hesitation in saying to Division you should be back on full duty. But is that what you want?"

Nick spoke slowly. "Yeah…I think I'd like to try Sarge."

Kate came up to the farm just to check little Megan was really okay which she was. The quarry was fenced off in part but of course she'd gone to pick flowers at the part which wasn't fenced off and lost her balance and gone over.

"Very lucky," Kate said quietly to Nick as she went back to her car. She smiled at him. "I'm glad you're going to give it another chance Nick. We'll never forget Daisy and what happened. But you must know you couldn't have saved her. Nick?"

He nodded. "I wanted to save her so much Kate. I thought I could…"

"I know love. I know. But you did all you could with what you had. You're a good bloke Nick Rowan, a good copper. And you care. It shouldn't have happened what happened. But you have so much to give. It would be a tragedy to walk away."

He hugged her. "I don't think I could have seen this through without you."

She let herself stay in his arms for a moment or two. There was still some way to go before the horror of that day was put behind him. Perhaps to some extent it would never leave him. But at least they could move forward. Slowly, step by step, together.


End file.
